Beautiful Penmanship

Have you ever encountered someone who is so extraordinarily good looking that it makes your brain go numb? All capacity for wit, or even speech, fly out the window and you are left standing there like an awkward statue trying to convey every ounce of emotion through ever widening eyes.

No? Uh…yeah… me either then. Pbshhh, LAME!

I mean… except for that ONE time.  {cough}

I was at my customer’s site for a meeting.  Me and two other coworkers were cramped into one tiny visitor’s cubicle.  There was one desk, one chair and one pen among us. And since I’m the more senior one , I was using all three.

That’s when he appeared.

One minute I was scribbling down notes with my coworker’s pen, the next minute The Most Beautiful Man Known To Human Kind (MBMKTHK) popped his head into our cubicle.

I honestly can’t say what he looked like.  The three of us later tried to remember, but we all three came away with wildly different accounts of his beauty.  All I know is that he was tall, shrouded by a glowing light and I heard angels singing.

As I sat, frozen and staring at him wide-eyed and opened mouth, I could tell that he was saying something.  If only these angels would stop singing I could maybe hear what he’s trying to say!

MBMKTHK: {chuckle} I said… can I borrow a pen?

Me: {Pen? He wants a pen? What’s a pen? OH! THIS pen! Right… Oh… but it’s not my pen.  I don’t want to get credit for giving him a pen that isn’t mine. I should explain to him that it’s my coworker’s pen so that she doesn’t get mad at me. But I kind of do want the credit because maybe he’ll be so grateful for the pen that he’ll want to tear down these cubicle walls and carry me off into the sunset}

As I’m having this huge internal struggle about the pen I realize he’s been standing there for a good 2 minutes with three awe-struck women staring at him – and no pen.  Right, I thought.  Pull yourself together, woman! Just hand over the pen.

Me: {Holds pen 1 inch away from my body} Here.

MBMKTHK: Um…

Me: {Stretches arm out another ½ inch. That’s as far as my statue state will allow}

Coworker 1: {Nudges me – nothing.Wrestles pen from my vice grip and gives him the pen}

Me: {Covered in sweat, relieved Coworker 1 could compose herself so quickly}

MBMKTHK: {Scribbles something down} Thanks ladies! {walks away shaking his head}

Had I been one of those non-awkward people who have the capacity to speak around gorgeous men – or just men in general- I would’ve made a joke. Asked him his name. Offered to have his beautiful, angelic babies.

Instead, I’m me. And I sat motionless holding “out” the pen an inch from my body – because that’s not awkward at all.  {slaps hand over face in shame}. 

Tags: Awkward, Awkward Charm, Awkward Statue, Beautiful, charm, Man, Pen, The Most Beautiful Man Known To Human Kind